Musings of a Catholic Convert

Tonight, I'm home working some laundry, and I say to myself, "Self, maybe you can watch a movie.  Let's see what's available on Pay-Per-View."  I had heard about the last Rambo film and had an expectation of explosions and gun battles akin to a John Woo film.  I also had in my mind every "rescue people from jungle captors" film I've ever seen.  I could never have predicted what I would see, nor what would my reaction be.  After what seemed to me like only about 20 minutes, I had turned off the video, fallen to the ground, and sobbed like I have not done in years.   Why? 

If you haven't seen the movie, I first need to tell you that I cannot reccomend it.  Even for a callous and desensitized person such as myself, this movie went beyond even my limits for depictions of violence.  Yet, it was this depiction that caused me to weep.  I need to explain the premise for the movie.  The setting is Burma, home to yet another civil war and mass genocide.  Rambo is supposed to help get some missionaries to a remote village to give aid, only to be involved in a rescue mission after things turn sour.  Not only did the movie discuss the violence and abuse occuring in these lands, it showed it.  I will not tell you of the images I saw, but they are burned into my mind and my heart, not because the images were so dramatically displayed, but because this is what is really happening in nations like this all around the world.  

It was after seeing a village razed, after the missionaries had arrived, that I could not take any more.  I fell to my knees and buried my face in my hands.  I just cried out to God for mercy - mercy for those innocent men, women, and children who are the victims of brutality.  They are not combatants in a military conflict.  They are civilians.  Yet, they are the targets, kept "in check" through fear, death, and torture.  My heart goes out to these places, most of which I can't even show you on a map, and which you won't see on the news.  Sure, there are some "high profile" places that we know about such as Darfur, but the problems are not limited to those persons.

Here in the United States, we are so very very blessed.  Not only do we have great wealth compared to the rest of the world, but we are safe.  We do not have to worry about a military group invading our homes in the middle of the night to take our lives, to imprison us, or to torture us.  We do not have to worry about being singled out as a cultural or religious group to be lined up and exterminated.  And yet, we whine and complain about being misrepresented, about not having an official prayer in schools.  As a descendant of Irish immigrants and as a Catholic, I see how people were mistreated and discriminated against.  I have read in the history books about the ethnic ghettos and the employment postings stating "No Irish.  No Catholics."  But they weren't being dragged from their homes and killed.  They were disliked, maybe even hated, but they weren't murdered.  Not here.  So when I read about the horrible things happening outside these United States, I cry, especially for the children.  I pray for their protection.  I beg for an end to the madness of war and destruction, of torture and abuse, and I ask God to bring it about quickly.

And I want to mention something else while I'm thinking about it.  This sort of persecution and devastation takes place in the Philippines and in the nations of Africa, and Asia, and yet these lands send missionaries to us.  They send missionaries to US.  We who have it so good and so privledged are in such dire need of the Gospel in our lives that other nations, even those marred by war, send men and women to our lands.  What makes it even more sad is that we have a church building on almost every street corner in some towns.  Why is it that Americans just don't get it?  Could it be that we think we do have it?  Could it be that most Americans consider themselves just religious enough to "slip by"?  Slip by what?  Do they even realize the reality of their own sin?  Do they realize their need for a savior?  Do they know how to receive salvation, and what it means to have a relationship with God?  Or have they created a religion to suit their needs, not too intrusive, but just enough to make them think they're where they need to be.  Just enough to give them a warm fuzzy feeling, but not enough to make them want to change their lives, any more than lip service anyway.

So let's pray.  Pray for a lot of things, but let's stop praying for all our petty wants and spend what little time we give to God praying for the salvation of souls, for the changing of hearts, for peace, for love.  Let's pray that our hearts, minds, actions, and wallets would be open to do whatever it takes to help bring about peace and the spread of the gospel.  They need our prayers, they need our support, and, when God calls us, our presence and actions to help in His name.  God grant that we would be obedient children.  God have mercy on us all. 

So, in one sense I can say I wasted five bucks, because I paid for a movie I didn't finish.  But that five bucks also did a lot to remind me of how lucky I am to be where I am and to weep and pray for the men, women and children who face death every hour of every day.